For the death of the 12 Disciples see APOSTLES
To: Jesus, Son of Joseph
Woodcrafter's Carpenter Shop
From: Jordan Management Consultants
Thank you for submitting the resumes of the twelve men you have picked for managerial
positions in your new organization. All of them have now taken our battery of tests; and
we have not only run the results through our computer, but also arranged personal
interviews for each of them with our psychologist and vocational aptitude consultant.
The profiles of all tests are included, and you will want to study each of them
As part of our service, we make some general comments for your guidance, much as an
auditor will include some general statements. This is given as a result of staff
consultation, and comes without any additional fee.
It is the staff opinion that most of your nominees are lacking in background, education
and vocational aptitude for the type of enterprise you are undertaking. They do not have
the team concept. We would recommend that you continue your search for persons of
experience in managerial ability and proven capability.
Simon Peter is emotionally unstable and given to fits of temper. Andrew has absolutely
no qualities of leadership. The two brothers, James and John, the sons of Zebedee, place
personal interest above company loyalty. Thomas demonstrates a questioning attitude that
would tend to undermine morale. We feel that it is our duty to tell you that Matthew had
been blacklisted by the Greater Jerusalem Better Business Bureau; James, the son of
Alphaeus, and Thaddaeus definitely have radical leanings, and they both registered a high
score on the manic-depressive scale.
One of the candidates, however, shows great potential. He is a man of ability and
resourcefulness, meets people well, has a keen business mind, and has contacts in high
places. He is highly motivated, ambitious, and responsible. We recommend Judas Iscariot as
your controller and right-hand man. All of the other profiles are self-explanatory.
We wish you every success in your new venture.
Jordan Management Consultants
Tim Hansel, Eating Problems for Breakfast, Word Publishing, 1988,